Playing With My Food

This past Sunday was not exactly a day of rest for me.  (Sorry, God).  I decided that while I had most of the day at home, I’d grab the kids and we’d pre-cook all most of the meals or this week.  We had a blast.  Since I enjoy cooking so much, maybe it’s not a Sabbath violation - I was just partaking in an enjoyable “hobby”.

We’ve eaten out FAR too much this summer (having the kids get home at 5:45 instead of 3:30 really messes up the family schedule).  We’re trying to save money for a Disney World ‘Grand Gathering’ next year with grandparents and my siblings - I must be crazy - and we’ve challenged ourselves to spend a certain amount less per month than we have been so far this year.  That means going back to the envelope system, and eating at home.  I swear, based on past results, just those two actions alone save us over $1K a month.

Anyway, I’ve been in a creative mood lately.  Since I was grilling steaks, I decided to use the free cooking energy from the charcoal and cook a couple of other meals.  Of course there were hamburgers (my daughter has a micro cake pan that forms perfect quarter pound patties!), and I did a little experimentation.  I used my wife’s very simple beef bulgogi sauce recipe as a marinade for grilled smoked chicken.  Soy sauce,sugar,sesame oil, garlic, that’s all.  I left out the green onions because I was using it as a marinade, but added onion powder for flavor.

I cooked the chicken using mostly indirect heat (with the sugar you do NOT want to cook these over high direct heat).  Y’all - they were scrumptious!  I served them last night with steamed rice and southern slow-cooked green beans.  The kids ate all of it!  I have a Korean/redneck fusion hit.

By the way, I suspect that beef bulgogi meat would make an awesome sandwich, with a vinegar-based slaw right on it - just like a pork BBQ sandwich.  I might try that next week. 

Last week, Alton Brown had a rerun of a show about pocket pies.  I thought at the time that it would be really cool to take a few leftovers (new potatoes, corn), and mix them with ground beef and onions and put them in a pocket pie.  I started to do a little research on my grand creation and discovered that there is nothing new under the sun: they call them empanadas.  Duh.  I finally settled on a recipe that was similar, and threw in a little cumin and garlic into the filling as well.  Later this week, I’ll make the dough for the pies (it’s basically well-kneaded biscuit dough), and cook them.  I can’t decide whether to bake, pan fry, or deep fry.  I think authentic empanadas are pan fried (baking would be too dry, deep frying is better for fruit pies).

I finally figured out a way to get my kids to eat salad.  Grow your own.  Trillian’s Aerogarden had been producing herbs nicely, but I sucked at preserving them, so we decided to switch.  We now grow salad greens in the Aerogarden.  This also solves another long-standing problem.  We would buy bagged salad or heads of lettuce over the weekend, and by the time we would get around to actually having salad, the lettuce would be brown.  With the Aerogarden, you pick what you need when you need it.  We’ve got it right there in out dining room.  So tonight, we’ll have steak fajita salads (no tortilla bowl, though).  My kids love it (crossing fingers they never figure out that it’s a relatively healthy meal).

Trillian is on a “cake kick”.  She is teaching herself how to properly bake cakes (please don’t ask how last night’s experiment went), and we’ll be signing her up for a cake decorating class soon.  I hope this hobby sticks.  She could pay her way through college, just doing wedding cakes.

So, anyway, that’s my adventures with food this week (the rest is simple stuff like chicken salad).  Boring, I know, but it was wonderful to actually get my kids involved in the kitchen this week.

Feel Good Friday: Independence Day Edition

Happy Independence Day Everyone!

I Just Have No Words For This

I was looking for a video of the novelty song from the mid 70’s by Larry Groce called “Junk Food Junkie” to post for “Feel Good Thursday” (Friday, I’ll be posting the greatest patriotic song ever recorded).  Anyway, there are no videos of Groce performing the song, but I ran across this, and my head nearly exploded:

OMG.  Mackenzie Phillips.  The Jacksons.  Michael Jackson playing “Mikey”.  It’s a carnival of nostalgic bizarre-ness.

By the way, whenever “Junk Food Junkie” comes up in my iPod, I think of Brittney Gilbert.  I have no idea why, except maybe remembering her struggles with a strictly vegan diet.  But of course, she wasn’t even born when this song was a hit.

It’s funny how the song is still relevant today, minus the peasant shirt and Euell GIbbons references.

For you youngins who don’t remember the song, here’s a video someone made illustrating the original.  WARNING to Kat Coble: there are visual fat kid references, which, I think, are unfortunate, and ruin an otherwise great video.

Commute Conversation

Trillian: I’m going commando.

Me: Come Again?

Trillian: After swimming at camp, I didn’t want to wear underwear. [FYI - she's wearing jeans].

Zaphod: Oh, that is just sick!  I could NEVER go commando!

She: Why?  It’s pretty comfortable.

Me: Zaphod and I have…er..things that need to be constrained.

Trillian: His deflated balls?

Me: Huh?

Trillian: Last night we were shooting roman candles.  My flaming balls had a report.  His were silent.  He had deflated, flaming balls.

Zaphod: She said “balls”.

Did I tell you I have a 10 and 11 year old?  And they Iowa tested at near or above college level.  Yet, they are a weird combination of Beavis and Butthead and Paris Hilton.

To fathers: nothing can prepare you for the day that your daughter blurts out that she’s, at that very moment, going commando.

Sometimes I Feel Like A Motherless Child

While we’re in the mode of criticizing Disney, I was fascinated by Tracee Sioux’s rant against Hannah Montana.  It’s a great read, if only for the passion displayed:

But, if it’s a choice between YOU and ME in my daughter’s life. Well, I pick ME. Because I add quality and you, well, you don’t. When your snotty, bratty, disrespectful banter comes out of my daughter’s mouth - well, to be completely truthful, I feel like slapping her. I don’t. But, really, it shouldn’t take so much effort to stop the impulse.

Also, you’re not really age-appropriate no matter how small you make the t-shirts or commando market to Kindergarteners and pre-schoolers.

She’s right - Hannah Montana (and none of the other programming marketed at tweens) is not appropriate for a 6-year-old, IMHO.  In a few years? Sure, but by then, tweens will be on to the next big thing.

As an aside, if you treat child-rearing as an expression of your politics, (if you read Tracee’s blog, you know this is true about her, she makes no bones about it) all I can say is that you are in for a rude awakening in a few years.

But, that’s not what I wanted to talk about.  Later in the rant, she links to an older article in the LA times by Rosa Brooks.

OMG.

At first, I thought it was satire.  I read it three times to make sure.  SHE’S SERIOUS:

You didn’t think Disney was going to stand idly by while you engaged in those little feminist critiques, did you now? Pause for a moment to consider the fate of the princesses’ mommies in those Disney movies. “Cinderella” and “Snow White”? Mothers killed off by mysterious illnesses. “Beauty and the Beast,” “The Little Mermaid” and “Aladdin”? Mothers all missing; presumed dead.

Disney really has it in for mommies: Even when you leave princess-land, it’s the same pattern. Bambi’s mom? Shot dead by a hunter. Nemo’s mom? Eaten by a barracuda. Of all the major princesses, only Sleeping Beauty (a.k.a. Aurora; like all criminals, she often goes by an alias) has a nuclear family, not that it does her any good. But given Disney’s track record, I wouldn’t want to underwrite her mother’s life insurance policy.

Now, I’ll admit that it is kind of interesting that in so many Disney stories, the mother is absent or killed off.  More on that in a minute.  But to infer that Disney does this as reaction to feminist critique?

Sigh.  It’s so stupid, I can’t even mock it. 

My theory is more literary (hello?  not everything is political.  In fact, few things that matter in life are). 

There are few things in the world the evoke more sympathy than being a motherless child.  Not to put too fine a point on it, but fatherless (either in reality or in practice) children are a dime a dozen.  And they have been that way for centuries, thanks to wars and workplace dangers.  It’s just the way of the world that we have more sympathy for the motherless child than the fatherless child.

I’m sure there are other reasons, but these fairy tales span centuries, and the theme has been around far longer than feminist theory.  Smarter people than me could try to explain why the mothers all die in fairy tales, but if you try to blame it on the patriarchy without backing it up, I will have to remain in mocking mode.

A Little Bit of Heaven In Bordeaux

I didn’t want to let too much time pass before I mentioned the incredible experience I had this weekend.

X-Alt took part this past Saturday in an open house event for the community in Bordeaux at Word of Life Christian Center.  The church had gone all out with marvelous food, inflatable slides for the kids, “fair” fare (snow cones, cotton candy), and music.

Politicians were there (including the local legend Thelma Harper), and there was some speechifying.  There was some not-so-subtle campaigning, and although many in our band probably won’t vote the same way as many present, one had to be struck by the sense of urgency and commitment felt by most present. 

Anyway, that was only a tiny part of the proceedings, and when the music started, it was hard not to be swept up by the spirit present in this very hot and sticky (and windy) outdoor venue.

Susie has her own God Sighting about the event at her place (hurray, Susie’s blogging!)

Our set was not bad (we REALLY miss Mark Mills!), and by the end of the second set, we had hit our stride.  The members of the Nashville “biker church” had showed up, and that coincided with us starting our rock set.  The timing couldn’t have been better. 

You haven’t lived till you’ve won over a crowd of bikers with your version of “Jesus is Just Alright”.

When the church’s praise team did their set, things really started rolling.  I can’t tell you how much I enjoy this group.  It’s just hard not to get excited when they are singing.

I sometimes forget to thank God for the incredible gift I’ve been given.  I have been given a small view of the width and breadth of the way Christians of all backgrounds worship Christ.  I have been in high churches with great organs and soaring choirs, singing some of the greatest hymns ever written by some of the greatest composers in history.  I’ve seen the quiet, somber worship of those struggling to overcome addictions.  I’ve heard great scriptural teachings, and liturgies that have been spoken for centuries, and heartfelt prayers inspired on the spot.  I’ve worshipped with prisoners who sing, and feel, every word of ‘Amazing Grace’.

Jesus left us with a specific prayer, and He told us that we would one day worship in spirit and in truth, but He pretty much left the ‘how’ open.  He did not tell us to face a certain direction, or say ‘x’ number of prayers per day, or do this or that meditation to reach enlightenment.  He did not dictate rituals that must be performed by His followers.  He did not tell us to make a pilgrimage to a geographic spot, or to sing certain songs, if we sing at all.

Now, we Christians argue over these things;  we have for centuries now.  But, I really feel in my heart that God is pleased, not dismayed, by the almost unlimited ways His children display their love for him.

I only say this because I was struck by one particular moment.  The Sounds of Life sang their wonderfully soulful version of “Trading My Sorrows”.  Several people started an impromptu dance.  Before I knew it, I looked up, and there were 50 or so people doing a variation of the Electric Slide.  Church members, community members who had just walked up when they heard the music, tattooed bikers in full regalia, old and young, some of us west-siders - all of us singing, and dancing and shouting “Yes, Lord!” 

This event was not billed as a worship service, but that’s what it was. 

Surely, this is the stuff of Heaven, no?

I sure hope Ford got some good pictures for the X-alt blog.  Y’all check later, it was really a great day.

Feel Good Friday Two-fer

My daughter thought this song stunk because all she knew was the Jonas Brothers’ version.  I had to educate her with a little 80’s old school:

After all these years, after all the money spent on thousands of lavish videos, I think that Aha’s Take on Me might still be the single greatest of all time.

Now for a little 80’s silliness.  We get SOOOOO worked up about “issues” that we forget how to laugh with each other.  I know that some might think this video is insensitive, that it laughs AT a certain group of people, but I would disagree.  First, it was a different time.  I think the song describes the situation for many we would now call “undocumented immigrants” at the time, in a humorous manner.  And secondly, this is Phil Collins.  Silly?  Goofy?  Formulaic? 

Of course.

Racist?  Are you kidding me?

But the song is the most fun I’ve ever heard about a “serious” issue.  Say what you want about Collins, but he knows how to write a catchy tune.  Now, whenever I see humorless people at each others’ throats over the immigration issue, I sing this song under my breath. 

Have fun!

I Survived A Japanese Game Show

With all the turmoil in our lives lately, my family has found joy in two diversions recently.  The Joe Cocker translation video, and ABC’s new hyper-silly reality show I Survived a Japanese Game Show.

I know what you’re thinking.  It’s got to be stupid, right?  Certainly the premise is cruel - certainly the show is all about making fun of someone from a different culture?

As someone who has been in more multicultural situations than he ever thought he’d see (and not through some contrived Celebration of Cultures one-time event), I can tell you that this show strikes just the right tone.

It’s silly.  It’s downright bizarre.  It makes fun of all of us.

The show is filled with a kind of joy, a celebration.  There’s the whole “show within a show” aspect (during the Japanese broadcast parts, the quality of the HD actually changes - this is by design).  The Japanese audience most definitely is laughing at the loud but clueless Americans.  We, the American audience, are supposed to be laughing at the very strange entertainment culture of many Japanese.

I have a confession to make: I LOVE Japanese game shows.  Ever since the first time I saw MXC (or Most Extreme Elimination Challenge) on Spike, I have been hooked.  Of course, the funniest part of the show was the American English overdubbing, but there was still something loveable about the crazy underlying Japanese show Takeshi’s Castle.

By the way, the lead-in to Japanese Game Show is Wipeout, and Americanised version of these type of shows.  It’s a little crueler than the originals, and not done in the same spirit of fun, but we still watch anyway - it’s like a train wreck.

But Japanese Game Show is just so much fun - both because we get to see an (almost) real Japanese game show, Majide (which means “Seriously?”), but we also get to see the reactions of the hapless Americans, who were not told what they would be doing when they signed up for an un-described reality show (why would anyone do that?)

An example of one of the contests on Majide: Big Bug Splat On A Wind Shield  - Contestants in bug suits carrying a goo-filled balloon on a chest-mounted pouch had to jump on a trampoline and accurately place markers on three separate targets on a target area decorated to look like a car windshield.

The audience is screaming and banging drums, and the host is as hammy as David Lee Roth.

The only part of the show I don’t like is the typical reality show cliches: everyone lives in the same house (with a tough mama-san, no less).  Characters give “confessionals” throughout the show (yuck), and a camera follows the contestants backstage.  There seems to be contrived conflict, and that’s many times no fun to watch at all.

All in all, though, it’s good, silly, intra-cultural fun.  My kids absolutely love it.

As far as the uptight folks who are afraid to laugh at our world’s cultural differences (in a non-condescending way, of course), well, they tend to run in pretty homogenous circles themselves, so I pay them no nevermind.  Life is too short to walk around offended, especially for other people (who may not even be offended themselves)

Check the show out next week, or watch it online at ABC’s site: it’ll be more fun than you think!

A Crazy Week - In Other Words, Normal

This will be long, but it HAS been a while.

It has been quite a week.

We managed to over-schedule ourselves again; we have a hard time saying ‘no’, and the things we signed up for, individually, are no big deal.  But together, they just about killed us earlier this week.

Of course, I’m doing the blog-a-thon, and I’ve been scrambling this week to put together enough posts to meet the required 24.

This is VBS week at church.  There are a few ‘big things’ our church’s children’s ministry does throughout the year, and this is one of them.  Lintilla and I have become associated with the 4th and 5th grade kids (we’ll be teaching a new group on Wednesday nights next year), and we volunteered to shepherd these kids through VBS.

This group of kids is incredibly bright, and problematic at the same time.  They are 95% boys.  A good number are ADHD (or at least they act that way), and their age means that normal VBS activities are too childish for them.  So, we adopted a curriculum that takes them out of the normal VBS activities, and involves them in “service” - little mini-missions (More on that later).

So, this past weekend, we had family activities planned (some of them fun!); that meant that household chores had to be put off.  Monday and Tuesday, I worked my butt off getting the house clean, doing the laundry, getting groceries, mowing the lawn.  I knew that starting Wednesday, there would be no time for any of that.  Our days, through Saturday, would be packed morning-to-bedtime.

And then came Wednesday.

After work, Lintilla and I had to meet with her doctor (the urologist this time).  A few weeks earlier, the oncologist had found a “spot” on her kidney.  We weren’t sure what it was, so we kept quiet about it.  But I had a good idea what to expect when the doctor asked me to come in with Lintilla for the consultation.

The doctor took forever to see us (don’t get me started about that), so we were already running late.  She told us that Lintilla had a small tumor - something called Renal Cell Carcinoma.  It wasn’t related to the tumor she had last year.

There is a surgery to remove it, that involves cameras, robotics, and all kinds of high-tech stuff, and it is 93% effective (the tumor does not return).  The doctor does not want to perform the surgery right now (neither do we).  She wants to look at it again in Aug/Sep, and, in her words, “the tumor will tell us what to do.”  If it has grown, we’ll schedule surgery soon thereafter.  If not, we’ll wait till early next year, because she just had another major surgery this past December, and I’d rather not her have to go through two painful Christmases in a row.

Both of us are just a little weary right now.  So, if we can wait, and no harm come of it, we’ll wait.

So, in the middle of the consult, Lintilla notices it’s after 5, and I have to pick up the kids in Bellevue at 5:30, or they’ll get taken back to Camp Renaissance in Dickson and I’ll have to pay a fortune.  So, I rush out to Bellevue, and barely make it in time. (One thing I learned delivering pizzas - driving smart routes is infinitely more useful than driving fast).

The kids are now upset that I can’t feed them - I have to take them directly to VBS at church.  We do get there about 5 minutes before the start of VBS, and wolf down some food the director generously saved for us, then get to the proceedings.

I can’t begin to tell you how awfully the children (all of them, not just mine) behaved.  The first night of VBS, in this curriculum, is supposed to be a time of learning just what service is.  But there are no activities, and I think this was a mistake.  It was simply chaos.  We never really got them under control, and Lintilla at one point lost her temper and yelled at them (fun VBS, huh?)

Then we had to stick around and make sure every kid (in all levels) left with a parent.  We got home at 9 and crashed, exhausted.

Then yesterday, things started to turn.  Work, for me has actually been light this week, so at least I have that going for me.  Lintilla’s boss let her shift some patients around so she could leave early yesterday and today and have unwind time before VBS.

For VBS, we took the kids to a nursing home to serve ice cream and cookies and visit.  Y’all - it was such a turnaround, it was just incredible.  To see these kids - the ones who had been totally incorrigible the day before - display a warmth and tenderness toward Alzheimer’s patients, well, it brought a tear to my eye.  I’ve dealt with Alzheimer’s patients before; many times they can’t speak back, but the look in their eyes tells you how they feel.

They were beaming.  Perhaps the presence of the children kindled feelings for their own kids and grandkids.  It was quite a sight to see.

Today, I am somewhat more at peace.  Plugging into that awesome love of God will do that.  Yes, there will be upheaval in the coming months, but we’ve become old pros at living through upheaval.  And we have an incredible network of friends who are eager and willing to help. 

Having a spouse go through cancer surgery is like single parenthood - plus .  You have the short-term pressures of single-parenthood (the household still has to be run), plus a spouse that needs looking after, along with the added worry of navigating our archaic health insurance system.  It can be a lot of worry.

But, Jesus says “Do not worry”, so, dadgummit, I will not worry.  It’s going to be all right.  It’s going to be better than all right.

Weeping may remain for a night, but rejoicing comes in the morning.  He will turn our sorrow into dance.  The words of my favorite Psalm are always there to comfort.  Soon, I’ll be dancing a jig.

I do not know, specifically, how we will get through all of this, but I know we will get through it.  I don’t *believe* it, I *know* it.

Lintilla, as usual, has a great attitude about all of this.  She prefers to deal with things by diving into distracting activities, so that’s what we’re doing. (My only regret is that we haven’t had time to sit, absorb, and talk about what all of this means) 

Tonight, we take the VBS kids to cook and serve dinner for the folks at the Ronald McDonald house.  Now that they are getting this service thing down, I have faith that it will go well.  I will have my eyes open, looking for God. 

I also have some stuff going on at work that might be very, very good.  Do I dare summon up the courage to switch departments and start all over again at my age?  We’ll see.

I know, I know.  It would be much better if I posted short, one subject posts every day instead on one giant post every couple of weeks.  What can I say?  I’ve been BUSY.

Jerry Lewis I Ain’t - But Please Help!

Yes, I have lots of news to pass along, and, I’ll be doing that shortly. 

But first, I’d like to ask your help with a project I’m doing at Ugly Betty News.  b5Media, the network to which UBN belongs, is sponsoring a “Blog-a-thon” to raise money for two different charities.  The Entertainment Channel is raising money for The Actors Fund.

The Actors Fund is a nonprofit, national human services organization that helps entertainment and performing arts professionals in theater, film, music, opera, television and dance through a broad spectrum of social, health, employment, and housing programs that address their essential and critical needs.

It’s a good charity, and one I’m proud to be associated with.

My part in this:  I am posting one post per hour for the entire 24 hours. (Thank goodness for timestamped posting).  You can help in one of two ways.  You can send me a guest post - it just has to be at least 2 paragraphs and about Ugly Betty - or donate money to The Actors Fund .  Ideally, $1 per post, but anything you can give would be appreciated.

And make sure to visit Ugly Betty News often today - I’m a little crazier than normal over there.  Have you ever tried what’s essentially a filibuster about a TV show, one that’s in its offseason?  I’ll be reading from the Ugly Betty phone book soon.

I’m only 1 post short of having the required 24 for the day, so one guest post will put me over the top.  Everyone who guest posts is entered to win $30 (which will buy a couple gallons of gas!)

Thanks for all your help.